Iliad Blues
by Luthien Anarion
Summary: What are the Gods REALLY LIKE??? Read and find out! Very dumb but this is my first one so give me a break.
1. Default Chapter

The Iliad Blues

By Luthein Anarion _  
  
_Note: I do not own the rights to anything famous mentioned in this story. This includes bands, famous people, and barnyard animals.

  
Chapter 1  
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We are introduced to our heroines, Kate and Amanda. Bored to death of traditional Iliad tales, and by their dull Civ-Lit teachers, both muse (MUSE! HA!) what it would be like if the Iliad ever occurred in real life. (I dunno why I rated this PG-13...I just did. For language. So NEH!)  
  
We see two girls chilling in the choir room at BHS. The weather is shitty, and it looks like a storm is coming. We see two girls. One is a petite with jet black hair (AKA KATE) and the other is a tall brunette with pale skin.(AKA AMANDA) Both are busy: Kate, is drawing, while Amanda is busy rocking out to Led Zeppelin, which is playing on a boom box inside the room.  
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Kate:-looks up from sketch pad- Hey, Amanda...ever think that...-glares-

Amanda: - Continues to sing along, because she can't hear Kate-Many times I've lied and many times I've listened.......-jams to air guitar-  
  
Kate: AMANDA!!!!!!!!!  
  
Amanda: Oh! Sorry! -Goes to turn boom box off, and promptly falls on her face, and proceeds to take a bow- Ow! I think my sneakers are to big....maybe I'm just a klutz.   
  
Kate: You're reading the Iliad, right? In Civ-Lit?  
  
Amanda: Yeah, I love it, I've read it before.  
  
Kate: This school really MURDERS the Iliad. -She then scribbles on sketch pad, creating a work of art that will eventually sell for more than 1 million dollars-  
  
Amanda: I know. I wonder what it would be like if the Iliad REALLY happened, instead of it being just a myth.....  
  
*The wind picks up and hail begins to fall*  
  
MOOO!  
  
Kate: Did you hear that?!?!  
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All of a sudden, a massive tornado hits the town of Branford. A cow crashes through the wall and knocks both Kate and Amanda unconscious, before landing safely on the abundance of stuffed animals in the corner of the room. 

As they wake up, they realize they are not in Branford anymore. The weather too bright, too sunny, and the absence of car dealerships tells them that they are in a place over the hills and far away.   
  
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Amanda: -Rubs head, before proceeding to roll over and lay face down on ground- Ugh. That was painful.....  
  
Kate:-stands up- You're telling me.........Hey, look, the Parthenon!

Amanda:-Stands Up- Oh, I love that Diner!  
  
Kate: Not the Diner, dumbass, the actual PARTHENON! We're in Greece! And it looks like we're in Ancient Greece considering no overweight middle-aged tourists around.

*DUH DUN DUHHH* Proceed to Chapter 2...yeah I know this story blows..*  


  
  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
  
A different font and 1 negative review later....  
  
*Just a note....I'm new to this...try not to totally destroy my confidence....please? I'm sorry if I offended anyone when I said this story blows....if you agree with me, stop reading it then, you cross-eyed hedgepig!*  
  
For all of you brave readers that continued onward, here is the next installment....  
  
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After being knocked out by a cow during a tornado that ripped through the school walls, our heroines, by the magic of literature, have been transported to Ancient Greece!  
  
WOW!  
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Amanda: We're at the wrong landmark.  
  
Kate: We're supposed to be at Mount Olympus, not the Parthenon!   
  
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RIGHT!  
  
So guys when I said they were at Athens, I was JUST KIDDING! They really are at Mount Olympus!  
  
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Kate : That's better.........Hey, ever wonder what's up there?   
  
Amanda: Yeah.....but probably there is a lot of snow....and snow....and yeah, snow.....  
  
Kate: But what about *enter trumpet fanfare* THE GODS?!?!?  
  
Amanda: Gods? Yeah....Ok...  
  
Kate: *glares* I don't care, we're going up anyway.....  
  
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-4 hours of strenuous climbing later-  
  
Amanda: See? Snow.   
  
Kate: But wait, what is that..... don't you hear something?  
Amanda: Yeah. Everyone knows that riff. Its "Achilles Last Stand," a Led Zeppelin song.  
  
Kate: Wait, is that who I think it is?  
  
-As the girls stared, they saw toga-clad man with stars dancing on his brow and lighting bolts in his hand. You would think they'd realized they had seen Zeus. But that's not what scared them the most. Anyone could recognize his face. It was....Elvis!-  
  
*This is very flame worthy, wot? Oh well, give me your worst.....again, I should stick to brainstorming, I cant write like this yet....maybe on the second or third try I'll get it right....HELP! IM NOT SURE WHAT IM DOING!*runs away*


End file.
